How Would You Fall?
by Encender
Summary: "Castle only watched as the assailant brought his hand up and pressed a blunt object into his side. The resounding crack reverberated loud in his ears." Est. Caskett. Set in S5 after Probable Cause. Reviews are always welcome!
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Castle.

Decided to dust off the old keyboard. This will be a two-shot. Set anytime S5 after Probable Cause, but definitely before S6. I hope you like Castle whump!

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"Oh no, oh no…. Oh, this is bad."

Stars swam in Castle's vision as he tried to take in a breath that he immediately regretted. Pain had settled in the pit of his stomach and his limbs were tingling to the point of numbness.

Gently, he pressed his hand to the wound and could only grimace as he felt the warm rivulets seeping through the cracks of his fingers. He shifted slightly as the cold concrete was starting to dig into his back and he instantly wished he had landed on something softer.

_Or—better yet— I could've waited in the damn car_! Castle chastised himself internally. _Beckett is going to kill me._

The image of the leggy brunette came unbidden to his mind. The smile that spread across his face followed not too long after. It was a reflex that occurred naturally every time he thought of her, even in his dire situation.

It would only be a few more minutes until she found him. Just a few minutes for her to realize that their suspect was no longer in the warehouse but had actually escaped through a crawl space, and got the jump on a confused Castle with his gun. She would get that look on her face, the one that spoke volumes but really only conveyed one message_— "I told you to stay in the car, Castle."_

In his defense, New York heat waves were killer and the stifling air had proven too much for him to handle. The cracked window Beckett left him barely made any difference and only served to tease him with the weak flow of fresh air from outside. He had jokingly suggested that she leave the car keys with him and the A/C on, but had only received an eye roll in return and a promise that they'd be as quick as possible. It seemed that even after months of their coupling bliss, she didn't trust him with the keys to her Crown Vic. Castle harbored no ill will towards her for that, especially with his childish tendencies that usually got him into trouble.

He had been casually leaning against the car, glancing every once in awhile towards the entrance Beckett and the boys had disappeared into and then down to his watch. He harrumphed as the impatience grew within him like the beads of sweat that slowly trickled down the side of his face. At this rate, he'd probably form a puddle on the ground from the torrid air that was beating down on him.

It was the sharp, metallic clang that finally grabbed the writer's wandering attention. It echoed throughout the empty alleyway and made him stand at attention, looking for the point of origin. He blamed the arid air for his slowed reaction and his inability to stop the hooded figure from slamming into him and shoving him onto the cruiser. Castle only watched as the assailant brought his hand up and pressed a blunt object into his side. The resounding crack reverberated loud in his ears.

He dropped to the ground immediately with a groan, his head almost making hard contact with the rough cement beneath him. With tears of pain threatening to spill over, Castle could barely make out their suspect making his great escape from the alleyway. He let him get away.

"Probably the least of my problems," he muttered pitifully, trying to staunch the wetness that spread quickly over his light blue shirt. "Beckett! I need help. Someone please… Come on—" a fit of coughing suddenly seized what little air he had left and made the taste of iron pool in his mouth. Breathing was growing difficult and the wheezing sounds he made resounded loud in his ears. Surely someone heard the gunshot and his shouting?

"Oh God, Castle."

He grimaced at the pain he felt from her strangled gasp. Her words were hollow and broken, almost as if she was already mourning him. He shook his head to clear the haze and reached for her immediately with his free hand. Footsteps stopped right beside him and he could faintly hear her yell at Esposito and Ryan to call for help.

"Hey there," Castle called weakly. "You prob…ably shud… lef' keys." The awful joke fell flat and the look in her eyes made him shift uncomfortably. He could see the guilt in her eyes and knew that she was already shouldering the blame for his condition.

"Kate, don_—''_

"Castle don't move," she whispered, stopping him in his tracks. She brought their clasped hands together to his injured side and helped him apply pressure. She gave him a once over and her expression only grew somber as she noticed her hands were already slick with her boyfriend's blood.

Beckett freed up one of her hands and caressed the side of his cheek, rubbing small soothing circles.

"Stay with me, ok?" The tears spilled forth and Castle ached to reach up and stop them. "Ambulance should be here any minute."

"No I… toldya… so?" Every word hurt, but he felt the need to talk to her.

"No not today, babe," she answered with a sad smile

He barely managed a dopey grin when his eyes started to droop. "S'warm now."

She clenched his hands in a death grip and applied an extra bit of pressure to his wound, making him wince. "Can't close your eyes, Castle. Come on let me see those blue eyes."

He nodded weakly and did his best to fight the growing warmth spreading throughout him.

"Beckett!" Two sets of breathless voices called for the detective. Heavy footsteps announced the arrival of Esposito and Ryan, the latter throwing a very worried look in Castle's direction once he caught a glimpse of his deteriorating condition.

"Is he_—_"

"He's fine," Beckett replied sharply before he could get his message across. "He's going to be ok." Her voice trembled as she struggled to reign in her emotions. She wouldn't break down more than she already has. Not when Castle needed her to be thinking clearly for the both of them.

Esposito kneeled down next to her. "Ambulance ETA is 5 minutes." He turned to look at Castle, "Hang in there, bro."

"Suspect got away," Ryan added with his head bowed. "We're sorry."

"S'ok," Castle reassured him

The distant sound of sirens made the detectives glance up in relief.

"Kate."

Her gaze was immediately drawn to his, the sound of his voice drowning out everything around them. She could barely see his eyes as he struggled to keep them open. The boys glanced at them nervously, and itched to make themselves useful but had no idea how.

"Alexis… Mother," Castle trailed off, not knowing how to finish his sentence. There were so many things he wanted to say, but he knew his time was starting to wind down. His strength was waning and he could only give Kate a look filled with love for her and his family. He just hoped that when the time came, she would be able to tell Alexis and his mother how much he loved them both.

Beckett was already shaking her head in denial at his look of defeat. "No! Castle, please! I need you with me…" She released his hands and grabbed at his cheeks, leaning down and pressing their foreheads together gently. Tears ran down her cheeks intermingling with the ones that trailed down his face.

A gentle smile appeared on his face at this last intimate contact with her.

The darkness pulled at him quickly when he finally passed out.

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I've always been told I've never been good with death fics. That's about as reassuring as I can get about a potential happy ending :) Reviews are definitely welcome.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I own nada.

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"Castle… Cast-… Rick!

The words seeped into his subconscious as he fought to clear the haze that seemed intent on lingering. With an unexpected shove, Castle almost toppled to the ground from the… swing?

Shakily, he held on to the cool steel chains on either side of him and struggled to keep the contents in his stomach down as the swing rocked from side to side. He felt as if something was off.

"No more pulling all-nighters for you, mister. I don't care how much Gina pressures you for new chapters. Although, we can blame your procrastination for her constant badgering."

A smirking Kate Beckett stood off to the side with her arms crossed. Dressed in casual jeans and her worn, brown leather jacket, Beckett was dressed appropriately for the cool autumn afternoon. She glowed from happiness and seemed to have an air of contentment about her.

Autumn? That's not possible. Except the fall leaves scattered on the ground told him a different story. Castle glanced around the park in confusion and immediately pressed his hand down to his side where he had been shot. He felt nothing there.

"I… I don't understand," Castle spoke. He looked questioningly at Beckett. "What happened?

Beckett frowned. "What do you mean what happened?"

She peered at him closely and noticed the pressure he was placing on himself with his one free hand. The other seemed to be gripping the swing for dear life. She closed the gap between them immediately when she watched him close his eyes and let out a labored breath.

With both hands firmly planted on either side of his face, she willed him to open his eyes and meet her own. He seemed intent not to.

"Castle? What's wrong? Talk to me."

He wanted to. He wanted to open his eyes and meet her concerned ones staring right at him. But he knew reality would set in once he did. This wasn't real. Castle wasn't sure exactly what it was but he knew he couldn't really be here.

"I… I was shot," he finally grit out. He felt her hands gripping his face more firmly and he took it as his cue to open his eyes. "I'm dying… or I'm already dead. Why am I here?"

The shocked look on Beckett's face did nothing but make him feel more anxious about his situation. He stood abruptly from the swing and pulled her hands away from him. His grip on her hands was strong and he felt very real warmth radiate from them. It grounded him and made him more confused at the same time.

"Castle, you fell asleep on the swing and you had a nightmare, " Beckett's voice wavered only slightly. "You were never shot."

"So this is real?" Misgivings oozed out of his voice.

She freed her hands from his grip and slowly ran them up his chest with her arms finally coming to rest around the base of his neck. A chill ran down his spine at the mischievous gaze she leveled at him. A pool of heat gathered in the pit of his stomach and his arms automatically wound around the middle of her back. Her head cocked to the side and the heat grew more intense.

"Tell me, Castle. Does this feel real to you?" She pulled him closer with each word and he could only nod his head slowly as their noses brushed. He tightened his grip on her as she pressed herself against him.

It was when he finally captured her lips that he truly felt alive. Little tendrils of electricity shot through his body and Beckett responded eagerly to his move. Her mouth tasted sweet and he only groaned as her fingers dug into the nape of his neck, drawing him impossibly closer.

Castle cursed his need for oxygen when they finally broke apart. They chuckled breathlessly and he felt his heart skip a beat at the adrenaline running through his veins.

"So… the park," Castle whispered. "It's way better than bleeding out in an alleyway, but what are we doing here?"

Beckett's eyebrows rose. "Family picnic remember? That must have been some dream. I only left you for a few minutes to help Martha, Lanie and Alexis set everything up. The boys should be around here somewhere."

"I see." And he did. He glanced behind the woman in his arms to catch sight of his daughter and mother sitting near a set of picnic tables laden with baskets and coolers. Lanie stood to the side with her hands on her hips and seemed to be watching something off in the distance.

"You hungry?" His attention was immediately drawn to her.

He sighed. "Not particularly. I guess I'm still feeling a little spooked."

Beckett nodded and finally loosened her grasp on him. "Maybe a little water to settle your stomach? Honestly, I'm surprised you were able to fall asleep on that swing without falling off."

"You're dating a man of many talents, Beckett," Castle replied cheekily. "How ever did you get so lucky?"

Beckett had been leading him to the picnic area but stopped short at his words. Thinking he had offended her, Castle readied an apology but also stopped when he caught a glimpse at the look on her face. It was one of intrigue and confusion. Her left hand twitched slightly and Castle knew instantly why she reacted the way she did.

The big rock on her left ring finger gleamed brightly with whatever sunlight it could grab on that cloudy afternoon. He was surprised it had taken him this long to notice especially with the size of that diamond. _Go big or go home_, Castle mused internally. _But I don't remember giving it to her…_

He wracked his brains trying to make sense of it all. He tried to remember. The dating, the engagement, their wedding… he came up with blanks. What the hell was going on?

Beckett seemed to be thinking along the same lines. "Castle… how long have we been married?"

"Uh, a year?"

Beckett nodded encouragingly. "And when is our anniversary?"

Castle stared at her like a fish out of water. Never mind the turmoil he was feeling at his sudden loss of memory. Now he knew this wasn't real at all.

"Castle?"

"Summer," Castle quickly supplied. "It was a summer wedding."

Beckett nodded again, looking thoughtfully at the ground. She was avoiding his gaze.

"I was kind of hoping for an actual date. Not a season."

Castle shrugged pitifully, not even trying to mask the fact that he had no clue what kind of life he lead before waking up on that swing. Maybe it was the site of a black hole that sucked all of the memories of whoever sat on it? Or maybe he was just losing it.

"We've been married a little over three years, Castle. And it was a spring wedding in April. But you don't remember any of it, do you?" He'll give her credit for picking up on it quickly. She was always brains and beauty. It was one of the many things he loved about her.

"No, I guess I don't," Castle confirmed morosely. "Because it never happened. I can't remember events that have never happened."

"That haven't happened yet," Beckett corrected, fingering the engagement ring and the silver band around her finger. "You want to marry me. Your mind gave me this ring."

Castle scoffed. "That's a pretty bold statement, Detective. And we both know I'd prefer an early summer wedding."

"But we both also know that I would want a spring wedding and Richard Castle would do anything to make sure I'm happy." Beckett gave him a playful shove and Castle stumbled back in mock hurt.

"I guess I just love you too much," he replied softly, reaching for her hand and lacing their fingers together. She still seemed pretty real to him here, standing tall and matching him wit for wit.

"Maybe you should tell me that when you wake up… right after you apologize for leaving the car."

Castle rolled his eyes. "Of course, even on my deathbed I must admit my faults."

A wave of pain ran up his arm as Beckett nearly wrenched his arm out of his socket. "It's not your deathbed! You will wake up, Castle."

"Geez, you're pretty violent for a figment of my imagination." He rubbed at his sore shoulder. "Besides, maybe I like being here. Everything feels lighter somehow."

And it did. There were no worries here. Not anymore after accepting the fact that it was all a façade his mind had conjured up. He had to give major props to his head for creating such a wonderful life. He was married to the woman of his dreams with family and friends surrounding him. What more could he ask for?

"It's not real babe."

His jaw clenched as the words clawed at him, willing him to face reality.

"If you're so intent to rain on my parade, why did you try to convince me this was all real?"

"Because you want it to be real and we're inside your head. But deep down you also know that you can't stay here. Your conflicting thoughts are keeping you here for the moment. You need to decide what you want."

"I thought I did?"

"Did you?" She looked around them, waiting for something to happen. When nothing happened, she let out a weary sigh. "I have a feeling we're going to be here awhile."

Castle rubbed his hands together like an evil mastermind. "Great. Give me a tour of this wonderful mind of mine."

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So… not a two-shot. Maybe a four shot? My apologies on the wait. I had actually posted the first chapter the day before my Maymester class started. Not one of my best moves, I'll admit.

As always, reviews are welcome and I promise to respond this time! Time just kind of got away from me the first time around.


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